March 4, 2018
I know what it sounds like. Like a wishy washy no-focus, giving up excuses answer. I get it. I’ve been telling myself this over a year. Opening myself up to the “what could be” feels like something that should have been hashed out in senior year of high school. I am all too familiar with the stories of remarkable people who knew what they were meant to be since childhood. The stories of doctors, writers and teachers are wonderful, but let’s be honest. Most of us don’t have that story.
It was easy for me to see that something didn’t feel right and that this was more than the yearly burn-out after wedding season. But I’ve been at this for a long time. Why quit now? Why, when things are so good? I’m financially stable, have a supportive husband, a full time job with a ridiculously flexible schedule, I don’t have children, and business is booming like never before. Why now? To be honest, I don’t have a good answer.
Maybe this newfound luxury of choice has given me the breathing room I need to see how my workaholic lifestyle really wasn’t healthy and that the hustle and grind mentality isn’t necessary to live a fulfilling life. Possibly, the break I’ve quietly already given myself has opened my mind to a whole new set of possibilities; not just the road I’ve been hunkering down on for the past 10 years. Or maybe I just want to be lazy? In all reality, I’ve worked at least 2 jobs for the last 10 years with 50-60 weekly work hours so that could be the reason. In short, I’m not really sure, and it honestly scares me.
Regardless, I know I have this luxury of time and choice. I’ve decided to take advantage of it and do or not do, whatever I want to. I’m going to experiment for a while and delve into different depths and realms of creativity. I’m going to study about mindset, flow and self-alignment. More importantly, I’m going to enjoy it.
An important concept that I had to face was simply, that I was not alone. Millions of people have allowed themselves the choice of change and have become more fulfilled individuals both to themselves and others because of it. Da Vinci himself, had a multitude of life paths! Inventor, painter, military engineer, a sculpture, architect, botanist and more. None of which took away from the greatness he left behind or that which followed. He allowed his changing interest to guide his path and the world became greater because of it. Thousands, if not millions, share a similar story.
To better explain it, I found this amazing podcast from the amazing Jess Lively that really explains the process about getting out of a state of forcing and into a state of flow. Hear is here. She describes a forced state of mind, where one grudgingly continues on path that was decided on years ago even though their heart and mind might no longer be in it. They’ve allowed no time to reevaluate as they gut-grindingly push forward. There is a fear of change, a fear of the unknown and even a social stigma to pivot your life into a new direction. In contrast, when you’re flowing through life you’re still taking action, but you’re taking action on opportunities that come more naturally instead of just trying to “grind it out.” The idea is not to have a stagnant life, but to move and take action with the flow of life and trust that this direction will steer you when you are ultimately more aligned with your true self and true calling.
Hence, I’m opening up my mind and future to the what could be. I invite you to follow along the journey.
“The only journey is the one within.”
― Rainer Maria Rilke
“And you? When will you begin that long journey into yourself?”
― Jalaluddin Mevlana Rumi
At the center of your being you have the answer;
you know who you are and you know what you want.”
― Lao Tzu